Looking Away from Workplace Harassment - What You Can Do When You Feel Complicit

If You Looked Away from Power Harassment, Are You Just as Guilty?

At the morning meeting, the section manager singled out the same person again. Only one figure in the handout was off, yet in front of everyone it went on: "How many years have you been doing this?" "If you're not motivated, don't bother coming in." You kept your eyes on your screen and waited for it to end. Watching that person's back as they returned to their desk, you felt as if, by saying nothing, you had crossed over to the side of the harm, and it stayed on your mind even on the train home.

Looking away and what the person who did the berating did are not equal in weight. The one who hurled those words was the section manager, not you. Still, the time you stayed silent is not without meaning. A scene in which nobody around reacts gives the person behaving this way a sense that "this much is allowed," and it leaves the person on the receiving end isolated, feeling that "no one is on my side." Guilt rises because you notice this structure, and it is also a sign that your senses have not gone numb.

Someone else will say something; it won't change anything if I do; if I speak up, I'll be the next target. When these three doubts cross your mind at once and your body freezes, that is less a weakness of character than one of the reactions that can happen to people in a group, known as the bystander effect.

With that in mind, the question worth asking is less whether you are to blame and more what you can do from here. Under Article 31 of the Act on the Comprehensive Promotion of Labor Policies, power harassment at work, framed as conduct based on a superior relationship that goes beyond what is necessary and appropriate for the work and harms an employee's working environment, is something employers must prevent by taking measures such as setting up a system to handle consultations. Paragraph 2 of the same article states that not only people who consult, but also people who cooperate and state the facts when the company is handling a consultation, must not be dismissed or otherwise treated unfavorably for doing so.

How to Choose Between Speaking Up, Keeping a Record, Consulting, and Doing Nothing

Which is right cannot be settled across the board; it changes with your position and with how strongly you fear becoming the next target if you act.

The right-hand column is not a way of running away. The fear that acting will make the workplace hard to stay in, or that you might be punished through your evaluation, carries real weight. Moves you can keep up while staying safe can sometimes last longer as support for the person harassed than one big move that leaves you isolated.

If You Saw It as a Coworker

A coworker under the same boss is close in position to the person harassed, so a single word from them carries a lot of weight. On the other hand, you are also evaluated by the same boss, so protesting openly is a heavy burden. Two things are enough as a first step: a low-key word to the person, and a record. Whether to go on to consult depends first on the wishes of the person harassed. If you take it to the help desk on your own when they don't want that, they may feel "it's been blown out of proportion" and find it even harder to move at work.

If You Saw It as a Junior or Early-Career Employee

For someone with only a few years in, stopping power harassment by a senior colleague or boss is hardly realistic. There is no need to push yourself in this position. What you can do is keep a record of what you saw and let the person harassed know they have someone on their side. If watching that scene every day is wearing you down, that in itself is reason enough to consult.

If You Saw It as a Manager or Senior Colleague

For people with subordinates or juniors, looking away weighs one step heavier. Even just cutting in at a meeting with "Let's talk about that separately later" can stop the flow in the room. If the person who did it is your peer or your subordinate, tell them the facts one-on-one later. If they are above you, rather than trying to stop it alone, gathering your records and passing them to HR or the internal help desk also protects you.

It is fine to have days when you choose to do nothing. But "not acting today" and "never looking" are different things. Even on a day you decide not to act yet, keeping a note of what happened gives you material for when you are able to act later.

Words to Offer the Person Harassed, and Words Better Left Unsaid

What you most want to get across when you speak to them is "It's not you who's at fault." As power harassment goes on, some people start to wonder whether their work really was bad. A word from someone nearby can be the support that stops that thought. Choose a place where no one is watching, keep it short, and keep the content respectful of how the person takes things.

Some people may feel hesitant to apologize for staying silent, as if they were handing their own guilt over to the other person. If you add it, say it briefly, just once, and go straight back to listening. If you follow the apology with a long explanation of your own circumstances, the person harassed ends up being the one doing the comforting.

Reactions when you speak to them vary. Some people burst into tears; others laugh it off with "I'm fine." Even if they brush it off, that does not mean your words didn't reach them. If they push back, don't press; leaving the door open with "Anytime, if something comes up" is enough. Sending it by email or internal chat leaves a record and may also come to the attention of the person who did it, so at first it is safer to say it in person or use a private means of contact.

When You Become a Witness, How Should You Record What You Saw?

When a company or an outside help desk checks the facts in a power harassment consultation, specific testimony from people who were present carries weight. Even in situations where the account of the person harassed alone was on the verge of being dismissed as "a matter of how they took it," a record by a third party makes it easier for attention to turn to the behavior itself. Guidance on how the person harassed can keep evidence is collected in "Coping with Workplace Harassment - Recognizing, Documenting, and Taking Action," so here we focus on the record kept by someone who witnessed it.

What matters is to write down the facts you saw and heard that same day, without mixing in judgments or guesses. "Said it in front of everyone, by name" gets across better to a third party reading it later than "It was awful" or "I think it's bullying." As time passes, memory changes shape to fit your feelings, so a record from that day, even a short one, is worth more.

Keep it not on a company device or in internal chat, but in a personal notebook, a memo on your smartphone, or an email to your personal address. For details on where to keep records and how to handle recordings, see the section on preserving evidence in the article mentioned above.

It is the person harassed who decides how the record is used. Tell them, "I've written it down, so use it when you consult," and when they take the step of consulting, take part in the interviews and state the facts. That is, to begin with, as far as a witness's role goes. As Paragraph 2, mentioned at the start, sets out, unfavorable treatment because you stated facts while the company was handling a consultation is prohibited by law. If you still feel uneasy, consulting an outside help desk about your own position lets you find firm footing before you act.

How to Handle the Guilt of Having Done Nothing

The guilt that remains after looking away has two faces. One is guilt that becomes fuel for acting the next time. The other is guilt in which self-blaming words repeat in your head and eat into your sleep and even your appetite. The first is fine to carry; the second takes some effort to let go.

The pain of being unable, because of your position, to take an action you know is right is called moral distress, and it can happen in any workplace. That you could not act is not a flaw in you alone; it is also bound up with workplace systems that can put people who speak up at a disadvantage. Seeing it this way can sometimes stop the blame from pointing only at yourself.

More remains that you can still make up for than you might think. Even days or weeks later, it is not too late to say, "I've been thinking about what happened back then." You can also record the scene as far as you remember it. Even after the person harassed has transferred or left the company, there are times when testimony helps in consultations or procedures.

On the other hand, sometimes watching is itself wearing you down. If you hear angry shouting in the same room almost every day, it would be no surprise to find your chest tightening with unease or your body feeling heavy before work. That is something you may treat as your own health problem. Knowing why relationships at work take a toll on body and mind can make it easier to accept your reactions without blaming yourself.

A Move to Prepare Before You Face the Same Scene

Your body freezes in the moment partly because you haven't decided what to say. If, ahead of the next time, you decide on just one line you can say without strain from your position, the range of what you can do may widen a little. In a meeting, "Shall we check on that later?"; in the hallway, to the person harassed, "Are you okay after what happened just now?" It doesn't have to be words that confront the person who did it head-on. If you can do one of two things, break the flow of the scene or not leave the person harassed alone, that is enough.

Also, check where you can consult inside the company: HR, the compliance help desk, the company doctor, a trusted senior person in another department. Whether these desks exist and how to reach them can be checked in internal notices or the work rules. When you can't find anyone to rely on inside the company, or when the internal help desk itself is close to the person doing the harm, use an outside help desk. Outside help desks include the "General Labor Consultation Corner" at each prefectural labor bureau and Kokoro no Mimi (phone / LINE support for workers), a place for workers to talk about their mental health, and both have set hours. When you can't settle down at night or on days off, you can reach the Yorisoi Hotline (24 hours). You can find somewhere you can call right now with Helplines Open Now.

When there is violence in front of you, such as hitting someone or throwing things at them, please don't try to keep it within the workplace. If life or body is in imminent danger, go to the police; if it isn't urgent but you want to consult the police, there is the Police Consultation Line (#9110).

If the person on the receiving end has long been treated in a way close to bullying, one option is to pass on how to deal with bullying at work in a form you can read together. What you can do is not fight on their behalf, but create a situation in which they know they are not alone.